All the Sadness In the World
by Yuki Schiffer
Summary: Orihime experiences heartbreak but somehow, when all things seem to be completely lost HE returns to make things right.


"All the Sadness in the World"

By: Yuki Schiffer

*An UlquiXHime fic*

_**~Bold Italics are for Ulquiorra's whispering~**_

_~~Italics are for Orihime's thoughts~~_

In her eyes, all is seen is a deep hurt that could never be erased. Hurt, that which no one can ever feel and be affected by as it had affected her. Hurt that no being should ever find them encountering, ever. How can one being ever live like she has? Is it even possible, the amount of pain one can ever live and endure? One lifetime is not enough to erase these scars which burn one's soul. How can she learn to love again, to trust? Looking back on her younger years, she smiles at how happy she once was. Happy, it is a word which means nothing at this point in her life. Life has no meaning if it is not with the one you love or have loved. "It is all a waste if it is not with you I spend my days, Ulquiorra." She whispers while stroking her long fiery hair; a lonesome tear running down her pale cheek. "Nothing is worth it if you are not here with me, Ulqui-chan." She painfully sighs out**. **_**How can**__**you say such a thing? Wasn't everything worth it before you met me, Hime?**_With eyes wide open, she responds to the distant voice she believes to be HIS. "Yes, everything was worth living, that is, before you left. Do you not understand that when you left me, you took everything? Was that not evident since day one? Did you really think I was completely honest when I said I didn't care?"

_**Hime, of course it was evident you were not happy. I only did it because it hurt me when your trust in me wavered. That is when I had to make such a heart-breaking decision. It hurt so very much that I almost didn't care that I love you.**_"Yes, I know. I understand because I regret it all. The pain is still fresh and the tears still flow, even after such a long while. The only thing I most regret is that promise I made to you." _**Ah yes, the promise. Have you been able to accomplish it?**_"N-no, not even close." She regretfully chokes out while she sits uneasily on her couch. "Can you blame me, Ulquiorra, for only being able to love one man and one man only? Did you honestly think I could forget you and run off with some other man?" She was holding back another pair of tears which burn her cold stone grey eyes**. **_**Of course I didn't.**_

**~FLASHBACK~**

That day was one full of tension which ached to erupt within her. "I just need a break to try and forget but, I want you to date other people too." He told her with his monotone voice. "How can I? How can I force a fake relationship? It's not right but, I'll do my best, for you." She stammered. "I don't want you to try I want you to, I need you to." He said with evident pain in his green eyes. Shocked and afraid she settled for an empty "ok". "Thank you and I want you to find someone you really like. Try to forget about me for a while…" He said with some hesitation. Eyes wide with sadness and unbelievable pain she was at a loss for words. "Promise…me…" He struggled out with a pained glance at her. With tears streaming down her discolored face, she had no choice but to falsely give her word. "I….i promise…I'll do my best…" she said with such difficulty. To her it seemed as though she had sold her soul to Satan. "Ok." He sighed and half smiled to her as if it were not a situation such as this one. As tears ran down her cold cheeks, she couldn't help but ask him one last question before it was all completely over. "Tell me, will you miss it?" Her lips quivered as she tried ever so desperately to be strong. "Of course I will every little thing of you." He answered to her quivering form. As she stood there, weeping, she realized that one day she would be able to hold him again just like before.

**~END FLASHBACK~**

Crying and trying to ignore Ulquiorra's soft whispering, which seem to have come from the blue, she sloppily tries to move her hair from her face. Sobbing uncontrollably, she makes an attempt to go into her room to isolate herself from anything and anyone. "Why must I be so stupid?" _**Don't put**__**yourself down, Hime. You are not stupid at all.**_With much effort and concentration, she navigates through her dark room ignoring the whole while Ulquiorra's whispers, which seem to have gotten louder. She falls and immediately the room begins to spin. As though she were not weak and dizzy, she continues to make her way over to her bed. Her eyes become droopy and her hair falls over her pale sweaty face. The world seemed to have stopped spinning only for her to see a shadow in the far side of her small room. Covering herself with a blanket somehow, she began to softly sing a few parts of a song she knew would help her tears flow effortlessly.

Wishing you were somehow here again,

Wishing you were somehow near,

Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed,

Somehow you would be here,

Wishing I could hear your voice again,

Knowing that I never would,

Dreaming of you helped me to do,

All that you dreamed I could…

Too many years,

Fighting back tears,

Why can't the past just die!

Wishing you were somehow here again,

Knowing we must say goodbye,

Try to forgive,

Teach me to live,

Give me the strength to try!

No more memories,

No more silent tears,

No more gazing across the wasted years,

Help me say goodbye,

Help me say goodbye!

*song is from the great Andrew Lloyd Webber's The Phantom of the Opera, "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again"*

Her soft voice echoes and she slowly loses her consciousness as her headache comes to an end. All the while, Ulquiorra is there with her to accompany her. _**Sleep, Hime for I want you to be well rested,**__**after all, I still love you. I only want what's best for you.**_He lovingly whispers into her ear as he holds her with delicacy in his strong arms. For once in long a while, his large green eyes are once again loving instead of cold and unfeeling.

She knows something is not right. As she begins to awaken, she smells something which is oddly familiar yet distant. "This smell of mint, where is this scent from?" She crinkles her nose in obvious disgust, for it burns her nostril harshly. Ulquiorra notices that she is close to completely being aware of his presence and regaining consciousness. Feeling her surroundings she finds she is not on her bed but on someone's chest. Their breath is even and calm but their heartbeat is erratic and uneven. Opening her grey eyes finally, she sees just who it is who holds her in his arms with such love and tenderness. "U-U-U-Ulquiorra!" Her face turns a bright red in confusion and obvious embarrassment. Just as she is getting off of his slender figure, he grasps her two wrists as to not let her escape him. "Unhand me, Ulquiorra!" She yells from sudden skin-on-skin contact. "Why, Hime?" He whispers almost seductively into her sensitive ear. Surprised by his tone of voice, she falls momentarily still with embarrassment and shock. "W-Why are you here, Ulquiorra?" She whispers softly, not wanting him to hear her voice waver. "I need you in my life again, beautiful. I can't go on living this way, without you with me I mean." He groans into her neck with much need. His warm and intoxicating breath makes her body arch into him ever so slightly. "U-Ulquiorra…" She sighs out softly as she melts into him. "Hime, I missed you so much. I need you here, now, just as you are." He huskily moans out in her ear. With much embarrassment and lust she becomes stiff and red-faced. "N-No Ulqui…" She squeals out, unable to complete her sentence, as he slightly begins to kiss and lick at her neck. "S-Stop!" She softly moans out with no actual attempt to make him stop. "Hime, I need you." He moans as he begins to lightly bite at her tender flesh. She gasps as he tugs at her long tresses as to get better access to her pulse point. _We must stop this at once_, _if we do not we might go too far. _Ulquiorra then slowly comes to a stop with his ministrations to tenderly caress her reddened face with his thumbs. Her eyes become somewhat glazed with lust and her chest heaves with every uneven breath she takes. Her hair falls unto her face ever so elegantly as he runs his fingers through her soft hair. Finally making her stand up with him, he turns her around with her back towards him. His long fingers dance across her soft upper chest and she exhales beautifully as he touches her hot skin.

"Ulqui…" She sighs out when his hands move lower unto her tummy and up her thin tank top. "I love it when you call me that." He moans into her ear as he traces random patterns on her soft arousing body and she arches her back into him. Her uneven breaths give him secret pleasure; letting him know that she was waiting for him to touch her, make her his once more. "Ulqui-Ulquiorra, please…stop." She asks without breath. "Why, Hime? Have I done something not to your liking?" He asks with sincerity in his low husky voice. "N-No…I just think that….well…this is new to me…all over again. It's like when we first began, remember how shy I was?" She asked trying to buy some time as to calm his lust as well as her own. She turned to face him when suddenly her face began to grow red once more and her heart to race. She remembered with sudden sadness what he looked like when they broke up. His face was one of seriousness and coldness. His eyes the color green but were no longer loving and vibrant. She turns back around and is broken from her reverie as she is pushed into her room wall. Her back is turned to him once again and he breathes at an uneven pace. "Ulquiorra, what are you doing?" Orihime yells in surprise as he begins to slightly push her into the wall as much as possible. "I can't hold back any longer." He groans out. "Ulquiorra…" She moans in pleasure as he lets his hands wander over her body.

"Ulquiorra…don't stop." She moans as she turns to look at him. For once in a long while, all the sadness in the world which used to lie deep in her smooth grey eyes disintegrated into the nothing because she had him back in her life. The moment when their eyes met that night meant that they would forever be together. And all the sadness in the world was no longer reflected in her eyes. And all the sadness in the world…all the sadness in the world…

"If you love something let it go, if it returns it is yours, if it doesn't, it never was."

-My Mom


End file.
